I haven’t published a personal post for quite a while; to my loyal followers, I apologize. I was in an accident March 09 of this year where I came close to being paralyzed from a neck injury; fortunately, I wasn’t. While recuperating, some friends and a relative or two urged me to start writing my memoirs; it gave me pause to reconsider some things about myself and my outlook on life.
` My life has not been easy, nor has it been ordinary; what it has been was one emotional struggle after another each a lesson unto itself. Since coming into this arena we call earth, I’ve been forced to attend challenging classes not found in any school curriculum. I’ve learned hard lessons that might have destroyed a weaker man; I won, I overcame adversity to finally, for once in my life stand tall, proud of who I am.
I would like to share some of the insight I’ve gained.
With your permission, I will begin this by stating that I will never again apologize to any member of my family for my past or present actions. I do not emphasize that to be mean-spirited or arrogant; I do it to forewarn any who may read my words.
If I were to apologize, it would be to myself for not getting the help I needed when I could afford it. Therefore, my introduction intends to be an opening of a massive door into my being, into my very inner pains and terror to release what was and allow what is to enter. It is my challenge to the shadows that once brought only loneliness and anxiety to an outcast, punished for not meeting the expectations of those who should have loved.
I will speak of the unseen tears shed over many years; the cries in the night unanswered, a family always out of reach. The trauma that permanently destroyed a lonely child leaving him to struggle as an adult.
If I were better educated and more intelligent, I think I might find worthier terminology for what I feel, and it’s causation, but I’m not so I’ll take a SWAG (scientific wild-ass guess) and call it: Abandoned Child Syndrome  – Parental Alienation Syndrome 
I will share my life story in the hope of maybe, one day being able to cry again; to shed the tears suppressed even now.
 Overview on Abandoned Child Syndrome – Its Causes and Symptoms, Threads of Feeling (2018), http://www.threadsoffeeling.com/understanding-physical-psychological-impacts-abandonment-child/ (last visited Sep 16, 2018).
 Linda Turner, Abandoned child syndrome Parental Alienation Pas (2018), https://parentalalienation-pas.com/2017/03/12/abandoned-child-syndrome/ (last visited Sep 16, 2018).