Lindsoe, R. Nyk
In his 1943, “Hierarchy of Needs paper, psychologist Abraham Maslow (1908-1970) theorized ultimate need of humans is to be truly “self-actualized.” Displayed here, the final need before “self-actualization” is “self-esteem; for my purposes, I refer to it as positive self-esteem.
At the end of my first Psychology paper, I asked the question, “Why dad?” I doubt I will ever get an answer but as of now, I no longer care. I took the childhood hours of isolation and abuse and turned them into learning about the world as I saw it. I took the pain of rejection and used it as a tool to mold myself into the extrovert I am now. I took the phrase I often heard: “You can’t do it!” and turned it into “I can’t do it if I don’t at the very least try!” I learned to face adversity with the only true weapons I had, my brain and my determination to overcome. Even when homeless, I never completely gave in. Yes, there many obstacles in my path; some of my own making, others not, but all lessons I needed to learn.
My one fear was arrogance! For some reason, I was, and still am, terrified of being characterized as arrogant because I am not. I am confident in the knowledge I possess and the knowledge I want to learn. Maybe, I do not have the academic credentials of my peers but they do not possess my the life credentials I do.
Do I have positive self-esteem? Yes! Have I realized self-actualization? No, not yet, but I’m still a work in progress; the day I stop trying is the day my doctor says “He’s gone.”